Confession of a Toastmaster
You know you are a bit obsessed with Toastmasters when:
Your social calendar is filled with interclub visits, training workshops, speech contests and meetings with your Toastmasters mentor.
You define your life stage as ‘Before Toastmasters’ and ‘After Toastmasters’.
You rehearse your speeches in the shower, on bushwalks, first thing in the morning, when cooking and cleaning.
You start your conversations with a hook.
You wonder what could be more fun than Toastmasters when people skip a club meeting.
You compliment your spouse’s cooking with ‘praise’, ‘praise’, ‘even better’, ‘praise’.
You notice lack of eye contact, vocal variety and body language when your friends talk to you.
You think of a speech when the waitress asks if you would like a toast.
You draw upon Table Topics questions when striking up a conversation with strangers.
You decline all social engagements falling on the 2nd and 4th Wednesday of the month.
Your friends know not to ask you out on 2nd and 4th Wednesday of the month.
Officeworks staff know how to navigate to the Toastmasters folder on your USB stick without you telling them.
Your favourite colours are maroon, navy blue and beige.
You scour the TI shop like it was a gift catalogue.
You spend 6 hours writing your first Area Director report.
You wrap-up conversations at the sight of a red traffic light.
You are horrified when people ask you ‘What is Toastmasters?’
You speak for 5-7 mins when asked ‘What is Toastmasters?’
You respond with ‘The Speaking Formula’ by Dale Anne Clark when asked what you are reading.
Written by Nancy Huang
